This summer I read and watched a lot of media regarding nihilism and existentialism. I got into all the mathematicians who went insane and starved themselves who (prior that that) brought forth evidence of the shaky bedrock of nigh emptiness upon which mathematics and logic resides.

After years of being (#1) a Roman Catholic apologists, (#2) a dues-paying member of AmnestyInternationalUSA™, and (#3) an advocate of lesser organized utopian principles, it has become clear to me that it is totally pointless to argue with someone with whom you don’t agree. They have their magical axioms with which they deeply identify. You attack it and they respond with fight-or-flight. But without smashing a brick in their face, ruining them economically, and/or threatening the death of their entire family, they are not going to concede defeat.

I have become so nihilistic that I could care less to what religion someone supposedly ascribes. There are the things people say they believe (or we assume they believe based on their affiliation with certain communities of Faith™ and/or sects) and how they actually operate in real life. When a doctor on the playground tells me he’s Mormon, I know every argument against Mormonism and I employ none of them nor have any desire to challenge their belief. Because it’s all pointless, so who the fuck cares?

Nonetheless, I do have axioms that dictate my behavior. Anchor me. For example, I have two young children. I want them to be happy and develop as healthily as possible. Become smart and capable. Thus, I interact with them in a certain way. We sacrifice expendable income to pay for private schooling that is very lenient on a child’s personal autonomy, whilst teaching the children social skills so they’re not a lousy snotty ultra-violent fuck that nobody likes.

And there other axioms of course, that cause this thus and thus and thus and thus. Like my desire to be a good writer that people read. Thus, my writing this stupid bullshit that only GoogleBots will actually read.

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